.eye of the beholder.

Many times today we want to blame our skewed idea of beauty on culture and the media. While these factors do play a large part in the way a girl views herself, we often forget the fact that this is not why we were created. Don’t get me wrong here–ask anyone who knows me and they will enlighten you on just how girly I really am. I have a weakness for fashion, makeup, hair, and basically anything on Pinterest. I know I am not the first one to tackle this topic and I definitely won’t be the last, but I want to share what God has been teaching me recently.

This past weekend, Pastor Steven taught from Luke 1 about when Mary found out she was God’s chosen servant to give birth to the Son of Man. My Bible app was set on the Message version that morning and the phrasing of the passage has stuck with me all week. When Gabriel came to Mary and greeted her, the Message translation states that Gabriel told Mary, “You’re beautiful with God’s beauty, beautiful inside and out!”

Every female reading this just had something within her go, “Wow, that is a great greeting!” Every male reading this just found a new Christian pick up line. (You’re welcome.)

God reminded me that it is not a bad thing to have a desire to be viewed by others as beautiful. He designed me with an innate desire to find beauty in myself and others. However, I must be careful of how I want that beauty to be portrayed to others. I can dress myself up in the latest fashions, have the perfect makeup and hair, and still not be truly beautiful. Why?

Because until I become beautiful with God’s beauty, all other beauty is not worth my time and effort.

Now this can raise two questions: how do I become beautiful with God’s beauty and why do I need to become beautiful with God’s beauty? And both have the same answer that I so desperately need to remind myself of everyday: life is not about you. Our outfit choices should not define us; the One who paid the debt for our ransom needs to constantly define us. When we show others that we do not live for ourselves, we begin to emanate a beauty that is almost undefinable.

Mary was not perfect. She wasn’t a Hollywood A-lister. She wasn’t groomed to perfection everyday. She was a normal girl. Yet she was beautiful inside and out with God’s beauty. Oh how I wish I could have been her friend. Imagine what it would have been like to sit and talk with her, to get to know her quiet and gentle spirit, to see how her heart was found in God.

I pray that you will begin to seek to strive to be found beautiful with God’s beauty. This doesn’t mean that you have to get rid of all of your clothes and beautiful shoes (heaven forbid parting with shoes!) and trade them out for an itchy sackcloth. It means learning to have respect for your body and dressing modestly. It means learning to find beauty in all things. It means learning to show God’s love on a daily basis to a world in need of love.

May we begin to become beautiful with God’s beauty, inside and out.

 

.different plans.

Today is a tough day for me. Back in March I received news that an Extension Site of Elevation Church was going to be opening on my school’s campus. For a long time I couldn’t tell anyone and it was the hardest secret I have ever had to keep. In June I found out that we had a set date, time, and place for the launch of the Extension Site and I was finally able to tell everyone. It was so exciting that the students on my campus would be able to experience worship in a new, fresh, and unique way and see God moving in a church in a big way! I knew that God had prepared my life up to this point to be able to be a part of this launch and I couldn’t wait to see how God was going to transform my school and surrounding community.

Today was supposed to be the launch.

But God had a different plan.

I found out about a week and a half ago that the Extension Site would no longer be happening. My first inclination was to fight it. Something had to be done to reverse this and it had to be done quickly. I was angry and wanted to go show whoever did this that this was a very wrong decision. And I wanted to write about it to help me process my thoughts and feelings; however, it would have just been a jumbled mess of bashing and not anything worth reading.

Without disclosing too many details for the sake of those involved, the site was shutdown by some concerned people from surrounding area churches. The school, in order to maintain relationships that took years to build, was asked to cancel the Extension Site.

Just thinking about it again makes my heart break even more than before. I think about the numerous amounts of students on my campus that are in a desperate need to hear the Gospel like they have never heard it before, in a fresh and relevant way. I think about those in the surrounding community who have always been confused as to why there isn’t a church on a Christian college campus and are looking for somewhere in their community where they can be in fellowship with a body of believers.

It is a difficult thing to deal with crushed dreams and a state of helplessness. It is even more difficult to trust that God’s timing is perfect and His plans are so much better than ours.

Yesterday I read in Jesus Calling by Sarah Young a wonderful devotional that God is using to help heal my heart and I want to share it with you.

Expect to encounter adversity in your life, remembering that you live in a deeply fallen world. Stop trying to find a way that circumvents difficulties. The main problem with an easy life is that it masks your need for Me. When you became a Christian, I infused My very Life into you, empowering you to live on a supernatural plane by depending on Me.

Anticipate coming face to face with impossibilities: situations totally beyond your ability to handle. This awareness of your inadequacy is not something you should try to evade. It is precisely where I want you–the best place to encounter Me in My Glory and Power. When you see armies of problems marching toward you, cry out to Me! Allow Me to fight for you. Watch Me working on your behalf, as you rest in the shadow of My Almighty Presence.

There’s a reason that the Extension Site isn’t opening today. There’s a reason other churches are concerned about Elevation coming in to their territory. However, I don’t know those reasons right now and I have to trust that one day God will reveal to me the why behind all of this. For now I have to forsake bitterness and turn to love.

I have to learn to love those who shutdown the Extension Site. They are in a desperate need for Jesus to consume their hearts because until he does, they will always see this situation as a competition instead of as another opportunity to reach others with the life saving power of the Gospel.

Life rarely goes like we expect it to go. But praise God that he is never surprised by what happens in our lives. Praise God that he is still blessing Elevation Church and that until he comes back, Elevation will continue to preach and live the Gospel every time the doors are open.

Sometimes our plans get turned upside down. Sometimes brothers and sisters in Christ hurt us deeply. But when those times come, may we ask God to keep us from retaliating out of anger, show us how to love, and lead us to where he wants us to go next.

.worry less.

In the next few weeks my life is going to change. I will be living back at school. I will be going to classes and having to the one thing I can’t stand– study. I will be meeting new people and helping to launch a church site at school. I will be taking a graduate admissions test and applying to grad schools. I will be trying to slow down time so this year won’t fly by (until final exams come around and I’m ready for graduation, of course).

With all these changes comes fear. We just finished a series on fear at Elevation and I should be able to conquer this with what I have learned, but it is something that takes me a lot of time and processing to fully apply to my life. When you have lived the majority of your life fearing the same things, it is not  so easily removed.

One fear I am facing right now is whether or not I will make the right choice concerning grad school. Getting into college was easy; I had worked hard in high school and I got accepted to all of the schools I applied to. To me, grad school is like an elite club. They only accept the best of the best because they don’t want to diminish their distinction in any way. Another fear connected to grad school is if I will actually succeed. College has been very easy for me and I fear that I will not find grad school to be as easy as college and will fail miserably.

And of course going into my senior year and attending a school with the motto, “Ring by spring or your money back” also adds to the fears. The Devil begins to plant discouraging thoughts in your head and makes you think you have done something wrong or you will never be good enough for someone. I know I’m not the only girl at school who won’t be sporting a diamond on my hand come graduation day, but some days it sure feels like it.

Right in the middle of my pity party, God begins to show me that I am believing lies from the one who wants to hurt me instead of holding on to the truths of the One who has prepared a future for me. Maybe life isn’t turning out like I expected it to, but maybe it’s because God isn’t done using me where I am in my current place just yet.

This morning I read a great devotion from Jesus Calling by Sarah Young and just want to share it with you. I pray that today you will be assured that God is for you and is waiting for you to worry less and trust in his perfect timing.

Understanding will never bring you Peace. That’s why I have instructed you to trust in Me, not in your understanding. Human beings have a voracious appetite for trying to figure things out, in order to gain a sense of mastery over their lives. But the world presents you with an endless series of problems. As soon as you master one set, another pops up to challenge you. The relief you had anticipated is short-lived. Soon your mind is gearing up again: searching for understanding (mastery), instead of seeking Me (your Master).

The wisest of all men, Solomon, could never think his way through to Peace. His vast understanding resulted in feelings of futility, rather than in fulfillment. Finally, he lost his way and succumbed to the will of his wives by worshiping idols.

My Peace is not an elusive goal, hidden at the center of some complicated maze. Actually you are always enveloped in Peace, which is inherent in My Presence. As you look to Me, you gain awareness of this precious Peace.

I have a feeling that I will never be worry free, but I can begin to worry less. God’s peace surrounds me everyday and I daily have to choose to rest in it or to reject it. My anchor this year will be learning to rest in God’s peace. This year will absolutely be another year for God to grow me and bring me closer to him; it happens every year. God has placed me where I am at this time to live life for him and one day he will show me exactly why. But until then, I will rest in his peace and seek to remove my fears that are keeping me from living the life God has called me to live now.